So today was a day from hell. In law, you win some you lose some. That's a concept you have to digest early on. Normally, in my area of practice, you don't ever win it all and you don't ever lose it all, it's a little mix of both. But today was a lose lose day. And it was a lose lose day for a client of ours which I really feel for, so that makes it hard. Especially when justice was anything but just. It's hard to carry that weight home on your shoulders after a day like today. It's days like today that make me want an escape. It makes me want a complete change. A person can only carry but so much stress with them from day to day until it starts to break them down. It seems like after one crisis is over, another one is right behind it- ready to stir up a wind storm of problems. I'm getting to a point where I can't take it anymore. It's not healthy for my body or my mind.

That being said, I've begun looking into new options. The three biggest standouts, are mediation, surgical technology, and pharmacy technology. They are all courses I could complete within a year, and they are all careers that would bring me a bit more income and a lot less stress. With a baby on the way though, I'll need to put those desires on hold at least until next year. But that would give me enough time to train a replacement for myself. It will also give us enough time to figure ourselves out, financially- to see how we could make it all work. We shall see.

Speaking of baby, our precious miracle is 7 weeks 2 days old today. We were able to see the baby on ultrasound last night. Had a slow, strong heart beat, and the beginnings of what looked like arm and leg nubs. It's amazing how fast it has grown in the last week and a half. The last time we looked, we couldn't even see the baby. My body is definitely aware of its presence. The morning sickness I lacked with Emery caught up to me with this one. And I am exhausted all the time, and normally passed out by 8:30 every night. No physical changes yet. The baby is still the size of a blueberry (or smaller), so my body hasn't had to make any major changes... but all that will change in the next months to come.

Today I found out that my best friend had a baby last night. I didn't even know she was pregnant. It makes me ashamed to call myself her best friend. Then again, even her own parents didn't know she was pregnant- and she lives with them. He is a gorgeous baby and I'm proud to be his Auntie, I just wish I could have been there more for his mommy the last 9 months.

I don't know. Maybe I just need a vacation. Time to get away from it all and relax for a few weeks. I won't have much time to do that soon, so maybe we should take advantage of it while we can.